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By Bob Weaver
WATER COMPANY OWNERSHIP GOING ABROAD - 160,000 West Virginian's
will soon be buying water from a British-German water company. West
Virginia Water became American Water and American Water will shortly be
owned by a German mega-corporation. The West Virginia sale is for $46
million.
Hundreds of West Virginians have written the PSC expressing fear the large
foreign corporation will not invest money in upgrading small appalachian
systems, or extending service to scattered communities.
The Kentucky PSC has approved the sale to the German group by a 2-1 vote,
but the state's Attorney General is trying to halt the sale by saying there is
no evidence local customers would benefit from such a sale.
World Trade, GATT and NAFTA-like plans are at work in this situation.
Ownership of local utilities by foreign counties, even life sustaining water,
"Will be good for us" we're told.
STATE DOESN'T KNOW HOW MANY CARS IN FLEET - A recent study was
unable to determine how many state cars are out there for state employees
to use, but also said West Virginia could save $40 million a year by
tightening the car pool. Maybe the bureaucrats could make an "X" for every
car they see with a state license plate and add them up on their fingers at
the end of the month, since computer programs can't spit out the
information.
PRESTON MAGISTRATE GETTING TOUGH - While many West Virginia
magistrates are not serious about collecting magistrate court fines, Preston
County Magistrate Lew Ault told Supreme Court officials he has already
collected $13,000 after sending 200 letters to people who have past due
accounts.
Ault said he will collect $25,000 before his project is over, with many of the
past due accounts losing their driving privileges. He ordered 89 people to
appear in court this past week. We assume Ault will not be running for
re-election.
ARCH NEVER SAID "I'M SORRY NOW" - Former Governor Arch Moore, 79, has
never been repentant of five federal corruption charges which sent him to
federal prison, and is now seeking to have his law license returned. Although
he pled guilty to some of the charges, he now maintains "It was only to have
been a temporary guilty plea and that a motion to withdraw was always
anticipated." Hey, he knows the talk. Give the man his license.
BYRD GIVES CONSTITUTIONAL LESSONS - Sen. Robert Byrd, sometimes a
trembling and broken voice in the U. S. Senate, continues to warn Americans
about current Bush bills (homeland security) being a threat to American civil
liberties. A historian, he warns we must slow down the attack on Iraq, if
history be a lesson. We seem to have blinders, or short-term memory, when
we get on the war wagon, particularly when most Americans want to nail
that weasel in Iraq. We should, for a few days, reflect on Vietnam, he
says.
DAD GUM HILLBILLIES ARE HOT ITEM - A Nashville producer wants to delve
deep into an Appalachia holler and find a hillbilly family to transplant to
Beverly Hills and do one of those reality TV shows about "real people"
whose communication skills allow them to talk trash to each other. CBS
says they are going to air "The Real Beverly Hillbillies" and the producer is
scouring West Virginia and other states for his reality actors.
Producer "Dub" Cornett, who sounds like his own stereotype, maintains the
show will break the stereotypical image of dumb and barefooted hillbillies.
Yeah, right.
North Carolina author and historian John Alexander Williams says the
hillbilly stereotype is the oldest and safest of all cultural stereotypes.
"Dad gum, let 'em make that thar pitcher show and quit a talkin' about them
thar nice city folks who giv' us a TV set fer actin' crazy."
"Darlin' daughter cin take her six babies out thar an not do any worrin' about
gettin' money from those boys who skedaddled when she got in a family
way," one hillbilly was heard to say.
Meanwhile, down at Capital High at the Mouth of the Elk, some folks are in a
pickle over the school's "Spirit Week" having a "Logan Hick Day," students
dressing up like those back wood kids down in southern West Virginia. The
Logan kids are mightily upset. Hey, here we are stereotyping ourselves,
while complaining about outsiders doing it.
At ole Calhoun High in the 50's, a period of cultural enlightenment, we had
Sadie Hawkins Day where boys and girls came clad in the least they could,
hillbilly dress, and enacted a chase and catch for mountain maidens, all
based on the comic strip "Lil Abner."
Sadie Hawkins Day was a rite of spring, interrupting the smoking of
cigarettes and spittin' tobacco juice, telling off-color jokes, and talking
about sex (without doing it very much), all happenin's midst the hog weeds
along the Little Kanawha during the long lunch hour.
Others canoodled behind the shrubs at the side of the old stone school.
Those serious defects of human behavior have now been corrected by
lengthy rule books and political correctness.
WEST VIRGINIA FOLKS LIKE "OWN CHURCH" - Despite a large decline in
church goers, West Virginia has the second largest number of congregations
(churches) per population in America - one congregation for every 437
residents.
In some southern West Virginia counties there appears to be an equal
number of churches built beside beer parlors and road houses, appearing to
offset the lack of spiritual values associated with each drinking
establishment.
One clergyman said "We follow the great American tradition. If we don't see
eye to eye over scripture, we start a new church."
In 2000, 650,000 West Virginians were members of 4,100 congregations.
WV GETS THE PORK - In most states they call it investment, but because of
Sen. Robert Byrd, they call it pork. Byrd has frequently been declared the
"King of Pork." For every $1 state residents sent to Washington, the state
received $1.73 back, according to a recent study.
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