RITCHIE COUNTY'S BEASON NEWS

(11/03/2008)
Kathleen H. Taylor
fieldaflowas@yahoo.com

Greetings from Beason.

The boys got to go trick or treating on Thursday night in Parkersburg. The kids always end up with quite a haul of stuff. Mom usually ends up with an O.D. It takes me a nasty O.D. of Halloween candy to get past the sugar fix. Just the thought of candy corn will gross me out for the rest of the year.

I realize that winter is unpreventable, but, I am just not digging these very cold mornings. Do you realize that not only do I have to get up painfully early but go out and start my car as well? I don't know who's in charge of the weather, but, really, I think that's asking quite a bit from me. Me+Cold Weather+Early Morning Hours=Not A Good Answer. I wonder if I could just pay someone to do that for me. Of course, there would be a few other little tidbits thrown in besides being Official Automotive Heat Supervisor.

One could probably expect too go ahead and add the following positions: Children's Chauffeur, Assistant to the CEO (which would be me) and Official Canine Nutritionist and Hygienist. However, don't' expect a pay increase or additional insurance benefits. Oh wait, Moms already do all these things without pay or extra additional benefits. Why hire anyone? Mom does it all.

I purchased some giant pumpkins at Wal-Mart (one thing that we can say that is from the United States) and could not slip them under Avery's radar. He quickly got the idea that I needed to pick them up directly after school on the following day and immediately carve the pumpkins. I then thought that Avery must have this elaborate carving in mind. We did finally carve the pumpkins but his has three little holes in it and that's it. Apparently, he had to realize I wasn't sticking my hands in pumpkin guts either. Not even for a budding artist. Yeah, I like to cook and bake pies, but rest assured when my recipes call for pumpkin, it's in a can marked "Libby's".

I have tentatively scheduled Ethan's birthday party for November 22nd. His actual birthday is on November 30th, but, he needs his birthday present before deer season. So, if he's actually reading Mom's journalism, NO MORE HINTS FOR YOU DUDE. Ethan will be 12. You know what that makes me? Ethan's beautiful Mom. You thought I was going to say old, didn't you?

"East Bound and Down" by Jerry Reed is my choice of the week. It goes out to all my Smokey homeys out there. You know who you are. We are the only people on the planet who can talk about a movie and end up making it 20 times funnier than it really is.

Peace.